Coven of Thorns

Retired!
Race:  Dark Elf
Coach:  Andrew
Description

 
Coven of Thorns team badge
Bulletin board from the coach
June 8th, 2018 - old news
Coven Missing, Whereabouts Unknown
Fans were mystified by the sudden disappearance of the Coven of Thorns following the opening drive of the second half in Thursday's Wild-card round matchup against Tyranny is Magic.

A series of uncharacteristic mishaps (and obviously paid-off referees) led to a 1-1 score at the half. After an unusually quick score by Bull Centaur Sunset Shimmer, the Coven disappeared into their locker room for, "a pep talk," with nearly an hour of regulation play remaining on the clock.

As the minutes ticked by, unruly fans threatened to riot (again), prompting league staff to send an understandably nervous ball boy to inquire as to the delay.

The Coven had vanished without a trace--along with all minions, slaves, coaching staff, public relations, agents, and "prey-species"...

So, too, had all the gate fees vanished from Stadium coffers!

Most unnerving of all, the inner corridors and chambers of the Wrath Lauren Luxury Stadium and Casino were suspiciously unbloodied.

Stadium officials were left little choice but to award the Wild-card victory to Tyranny is Magic, bringing the Coven's historic win/loss record to 28-0-3.

Thousands of Coven fans have already committed ritual suicide, and League officials have called for an investigation in hopes of avoiding further bloodshed...
- Andrew
 
 
Mar. 21st, 2018 - old news
The Price of Failure
After fifteen straight victories, the winning streak of the Coven of Thorns has come to an end. It is perhaps fitting that the Coven could only be bested by a rival band of Dark Elves--clearly, none of the lesser races were up to the task.

Despite this legacy of triumph, Oaths were made... and accordingly, there was a blood-price to be paid...

Fully half the Coven's Season Five lineup fell beneath the blade of Red October, along with the entire coaching staff, public relations council, and fans too numerous to count.

Rumors of an eleventh-hour escape by Satanico Pandemonium and Nobody Loves Raymond can only be considered the vicious slander of weak-willed and cowardly men.

Custodial staff for the Wrath Lauren Stadium and Casino are still at work, scrubbing blood from the marble floors.

The remaining veteran players, newly rejuvenated with the blood of the fallen, will undoubtedly restore the Coven to glory in Season Six.

We look forward to killing you soon!
- Andrew
 
 
Feb. 25th, 2018 - old news
Wrath Lauren Stadium & Casino Deloused
Die-hard Coven of Thorns fans were treated to a textbook lesson in rodent extermination in Saturday's 4-1 victory over the Hell Pit Cheezers. A study in violence, efficiency and a fitting cap to a flawless season.

As we head into the playoffs, can anyone stop the Coven? Will Nobody Loves Raymond's place in the league Hall of Fame be cemented, or will his accomplishments with the ball be overshadowed by Red October's skill with the blade?

WILL NO ONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!?!
- Andrew
 
 
Feb. 20th, 2018 - old news
Coven of Thorns vs Teamsters Local 953
After the untimely demise of Eldril Sidewinder during the opening drive of the second annual Elf Bowl (tm), it appears that the Coven of Thorns has roused the ire of the Blood Bowl Mercenaries and Star Players Teamsters' Local 953.

Famed bull centaur Hthark the Unstoppable lived up to his namesake on Monday, sending Coven witch elves Furiosa and Satanico Pandemonium into the injury box in the opening minutes of the game. Was this typical play in an admittedly violent and dangerous sport--or were the Teamsters sending a message?

After Hthark sent the Coven's newest rookie assassin to join his sisters with a broken spine, could there really be any doubt?

Inquiries to the Teamsters for comment were ignored.

Fortunately, the crack medical staff at the Coven's own Wrath Lauren Luxury Stadium and Casino (r) were able to rehabilitate the players without incident.
- Andrew
 
 
 
Tournaments played:
MoB Games 4, MoB Games 5, MoB Games 6
Trophies won:
Championship: MoB Games 4
Best Offense: MoB Games 5
Best Defense: MoB Games 4, MoB Games 6
Block Division Champ: MoB Games 4, MoB Games 5

  

  

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